Thursday, February 09, 2006

Grammy RUN-down my Leg

Hey Kids,

Luckily I decided to stay home rather than accepting my invite to the Grammy's from Lee Ann Womack.

Was anyone else bored?

Now I am a lover of great music and the Grammy's are usually a great source for wonderful performances. Who could forget Ricky Martin's electrifying performance a few years back or Pro-Active darling Alicia Keys singing her little heart out.

This year however started out with a bang called Madonna but fizzled out quickly. I was a bit concerned about Madonna's outfit but the way she threw those legs up and at her age. I was up on my feet, just lovely.

The things started to get weird.... Poor Paul , he really needs at least Ringo to make anything exciting.

I also have a sinking suspicion that John Legend and Kanye West are butt banging. They seem overly amore of each other, if you get my drift.

Thankfully Pig Pen, i.e. Kelly Clarkson came through with a big win and a great performance. I call her Pig Pen now because she always looks a bit sweaty and like she rolled around in some dust...

I thought things were looking up but then Jay Z and Linkin Park just messed everything up. Um I better watch it or I might get a bullet...

By this time I was drenched in Red Wine to wash down my beet fried steak. Yes, I am still on the beet diet. I have lost 13 pounds. Talking about pounds...

Mariah was up next and she looks like she may need a week of my Beet Diet. Don't get me wrong you know I love my Mariah and working with her is a blast.... however her choice of outfit last night was how should I say it... a bit Prom 1986. Also the Lip Synch tips I gave her have gone on a deaf ear, I tried. I know she was singing most of the song but she had peanut butter mouth for the last few moments. All in All I love Mariah and I am glad she picked up a few. Grammy's that is!!!

Now I come to the night of the evening when I am actually nodding off to see Mariah's protege Christina Aguilera. She looked lovely but she butchered that song. I am not sure if she was rinsing with Listerine or trying to hit a note. All I know is that she had so many Runs on her notes that she made me get diarrhea. Talk about the power of suggestion, yikes.

I wonder what happened to the spark of the Grammy?

I know that everytime I go to the EXIES(The Extra Actors Awards) I have fun. We always have some of the best inanimate performances that seem to work.... It is not easy to make believe you are talking to someone, ya know.

I think we should get Sly Stone to do a few jobs cause he sure can't sing anymore, poor thing.

Gotta Run,


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