Saturday, February 17, 2007

Notes on A MargOH! Scandal

Hey Kids,

There's a scandal a brewin!!

You all know that I was moving and have just about settled in. There were a few boxes laying around and since Cuchie is in Argentina...they weren't gonna put themselves away.

I started going through them and found that it was some of Berna's things. She must have left them when she moved out. It was mostly stained underwear and ripped nylons but there was a wooden box also with three locks on it.

MMM... A box with three locks is a bit suspect, don't ya think. I ran over to the tool chest to get my lock-picks (I used those when I had the bordello in bangkok just in case the girls locked themselves in the room, don't ask).

I got them all unlocked and opened the box. The first thing I see is a twinkie, it figures. I dug down deeper and I see a bunch of papers with paternity test stamped all over it. There were adoption papers as well and an envelope with Stumpy Jones's name on it. I opened it up and there were checks written to him for 5,000 a piece. There were 5 of them dated for the years 1980 and 1981.

After I saw that I immediatly opened the other envelopes and to my shock...then I passed out...I woke up on the floor covered in drool and wondering what had happened. I got myself together and crawled to the fridge and grabbed a bottle of champers and downed it in 2 seconds.

I crawled back to the box and looked through the papers again. There was a birth certificate and paternity tests from Stumpy, myself and Berna. I couldn't believe my eyes. It said that the test was 97.7% positive that Berna was Stoli's mother and Stumpy Jones the father. Then the other test read that I was 94.8% proof and should never have children again.

I then looked at the birth certificate and there it was, under mother for Stoli Channing was My Name but it had been typed over white out. I rubbed off the white out and there it was Berna Breckenridge.

There was another birth certificate as well but this was for a boy and his name was Jack Daniel Channing. Did she have twins? Was this real? I couldn't believe that Berna... Then I heard her coming in so I put everything in the box and threw it in the closet.

She's been here ever since and I haven't been able to get back to that box. I did put a little drano in Berna's Black Bean soup. She's not feeling that well mmm...

I wonder why....

When I am ready to pounce on this, I'll let you all know!

It's scandalous...

Kisses, MargOH!

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