Lynn Spears just called and told me that she did something terrible....and that it was all my fault.
MMM....How could that be?
She told me that she went a step further than my elastic and hot sauce idea. She bought a sling shot and a can of Lychee's in sugar. She then took the Lychee and dipped it in hot sauce and loaded the sling shot.
Britney came in from the pool just wearing her usual long tee that said "Spinster". She tripped over the baby's rattle and bent over to pick it up and Lynn shot that Lychee. Britney screamed with fright and fell to the floor. She then got up and was jumping around and grabbing her private area....ouch.
Lynn then told Britney what her plan was and they started fighting.... Then Britney said she really wasn't feeling well and that she felt like she had to pee. Lynn started to look for the Lychee but couldn't find it anywhere...she was stumped.
Britney then came out of the bathroom and said she couldn't pee and was having bad cramps. Lynn told Britney to bend over and she got a flashlight.. Lynn couldn't believe it. The Lychee had gone up Britney cooter and was lodged up there.
Lynn tried to get it out with her fingers, a pair of tweezers and even stuck the garden hose up there but it wouldn't come out.
She rushed Britney to their private doctor and they got it out. She still has to to douche for a week to flush out the hot sauce.
I told Lynn it was no way my fault and that a Lychee was not in my plan. I then asked Lynn if she was wearing panties.
She told me to hold and came back a minute later. "Ya, know MargOH! she is. I can't believe it".
She then told me she's be sending 2 grand and 3 cases of Mumms.
Job well done I thought to myself. I'm a good person damn it!!