Friday, March 17, 2006

Berna going under the Knife

Hey Kids,

Happy St. Paddy's day to ya all. The luck of the Irish is upon us. I am running out to stock up on my supply of Apple schnapps for my Green Apple Martini's.

I will be drinking them without my Wardrobe Mistress Berna Breckenridge though. She is having her gastric Bypass Surgery Today at Noon. This is the first St. Patricks day we have not spent together in 30 years. I will miss the way Berna drinks straight from the Green Beer Ball. My girl doesn't need a glass just a good spigot.

Berna is tipping the scales at... well lets just say she could not go hot air ballooning..

I of course am financing this surgery. I had to put out a pretty penny and put out to Dr. Chow. He is giving us 90% off. It is well worth the cost to get Berna to actually pull her weight around here. She has done a fabulous job on my costumes for the upcoming show and I am grateful for that. I bumped her weekly allowance back up to 50 bucks.

When she gets thin she will be doing much more than ever. This is why I must have her get in shape. The Dr. was more concerned about her health but I know that old gal is sturdy as a pack mule. Though this mule drinks her weight in Dr. Pepper every day. Well luckily that will stop. She won't be able to drink any carbonated beverages ever. Our soda Bill alone is 200 bucks a week.

Its no wonder why I am breaking my back with work. I just shot a scene for an upcoming episode of "Campus Ladies". Those gals are a hoot.

I think I will be able to work less when Berna gets thin. It is a bit strange that I have to work harder to have a wardrobe mistress. It should be the other way around, shouldn't it?

Berna get your ass up. It's time to go to the hospital. We have to leave early to take the bottle returns to the store. There is like 150 dollars worth of soda bottles.

Let's get you thin!!! Then you can wear Cha Cha heels again..

Say a little prayer for Berna Kids

Kisses, MargOH!

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