Thursday, August 12, 2004

MargOH! is back from Rehab

Hi Kids,

I just got back from Hawaii after a short stay at a spa, well let's say a tune up for a slight drinking problem. My Dr. says that his theory on weaning people off Gin by using Sake has worked time and time again and it's true I haven't had a stitch of Gin since I started the program. I just love all the different types of Sake and I have hardly sampled but just a few so it will take me a while to even think about drinking Gin again.

I did miss being away from my fans and the action of NYC. I missed doing my show "The MargOH! Channing Show" that is shown on Manhattan cable on channel 56 every other Saturday night but I am sure you all knew that.

The first thing I did when I got back was run over to Shirley's and have our favorite lunch egg salad on lettuce leaves, gotta watch those carbs people. Shirley told me that my wardrobe mistress Berna Breckenridge had been having parties the whole time I was away and one night was dancing in the hallway with Shelly Winters and her breast was exposed. Now this would be no big deal but Berna's breast is bigger than Shelly all together, ugh I could just imagine the sight. Shirl also told me that she was practicing "Goldfinger" for her upcoming tour and Berna was pounding the wall for her to shut- up or she was going to give her her goldfinger. I apologized to Shirley and went straight to talk to Berna.

I gave Berna the business and cut her allowance down to $15 a week from her normal $25. I swear that woman drives me into the poor house. Thank god I am still covered under Rodney's insurance or the stay in Rehab would have wiped me out. Dr Beefachaki is not cheap let me tell ya. That reminds me I should be getting that check from "The Sizzler". You see I get Royalties every time they make a Rodney Allen Rippy, a drink made of coke, grenadine a splash of bitters and a cherry. I invented it when I was married to Rodney Allen and decided to patent that sucker so now everytime they make one MargOH! gets a a few cents, dumb asses should never have added the bitters to the Roy Rodgers drink and thank god Berna loves steaks or I never would have known to sue the bastards for patent fraud, lol. I guess Bern's good for something. Oh, gosh I must go because I am meeting Margaret Cho for Sushi and Sake. Thanks Dr. Beefachaki.....

I'll be back

Ciao, MargOH!

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