Wednesday, April 02, 2008

My Tryst with David Patterson

Hey Kids,

There has been something I've been blindly carrying around with me for the past few weeks...well maybe that's not the best word for it. Let's just say I've been burdened by the fact that I to have slept with the new governor David Patterson.

Of course I didn't know at the time that he was a public official , it was a few years ago . I had just gotten off the bus on 6Th ave and 23rd street on my way to meet my agent Shecky. This was the same day he was to give me the bad news that I lost the "smuckers" voice over commercial to that pesky Willard Scott.

Anyway, I got off the bus and was making my way down the street and this guy banged right into me and I dropped my purse, which of course was filled with Nips of I started picking them up he grabbed one and guzzled it down so I followed suit...

Then he told me he'd never smelt a more beautiful woman...I was wearing my "white Diamonds" that day. He then gestured to the Chelsea hotel and said, wanna romp sweetie? I thought, Shecky can wait and said sure as long as he was paying. He pulled out a wad of cash and we were off. I must say he was a bit clumsy and had a bit of trouble paying for the room, I think the room was 200 but he gave the guy
500.I felt a bit pressured and thought, hell I better be good....

I was of course and so was he. He was like an animal, sniffing and probing me like a snake blinded by lust...Oh, there I go again. Honestly I didn't know he was blind, though now when I look back I should have seen the signs especially when he told me he accidentally put on his wife's panties cause the room was too dark, I was like, yeah , right.

Knowing what I know now it's all a bit funny. I do feel silly that I didn't realize he was blind but he covered it up so well and I didn't mind the whole pantie thing. He was a charmer and he did say he thought I was 25-26....I even said I thought he needed glasses and he just laughed...yikes....

Well kids, I feel much better getting that off the old chest. You know I'm going to be 60 next month. This is crazy times.....I figure I've only got 40 more years so no time for regrets....but if you listen to Barbara Walters I could possibly squeak out another 90 years.....I don't know...I couldn't imagine living that long...please I'd have to freeze Berna....



1 comment:

  1. Wherever there is history to be made...MargOH! is there. It's why I continue to wash your bras out every night...well at least the nights you bother to wear one.