The St. Patricks Day Massacre

Hey Kids,

I've been under the weather, sore throat and stuffed up nose..even my apricot Brandy is no help whatsoever....

Ya know when you say things couldn't get worse, well they can....

On St Patty's day I was suppose to meet Tippi Hedren out at Molly's for some old fashion's. I sometimes donate to her wild animal retreat, a few bucks. She was in town with Melanie because she's trying to land a part in "Spring Awakening". They told her that she was too old for any of the parts but she's not taking no for an answer...I guess she had another face lift and is trying to pass for 20 again....she wasn't even 20 when she did "Working girl".

Anyway, I was getting my stuff together when I get a call from Nicky Knockers who says she has unraveled the mystery of Stumpy and Stoli Jones. I was shocked she was back so soon but couldn't wait to hear what she found out. Then Nicky said Berna is completely innocent . I told her to keep it to herself until I saw her, Berna Innocent...I couldn't believe it!!.. She has denied any wrong doing but I don't buy it!

Nicky said she'd be back in a day or so. She was still interviewing Stumpy's sister in Missouri.

Crap, I thought she was in NY...

Anyway, I hung up with her and ran out the door to meet Tippi. It was cold as hell but I noticed that there were a lot of birds overhead, all sorts of birds...pigeons, crows, chickadee's and hawks... I wasn't sure what the hell was going on...I turned the corner to Molly's and There's Tippi looking horrified. She grabbed me and pushed passed the crowd to get inside.

She then says...Did you see all those birds....it's happening again!

I said yes, I saw them but there was a hunk of corned beef on the sidewalk....

No, no it's happening again, the birds...they're following me again because I'm old.

No, Tippi calm down...Bar keep "Old Fashion for Tippi"..

She grasped the glass and swug it down...That's better. "Oh God, look there pounding on the glass"

I looked over and the crowd outside were being attacked by birds at every angle. Trying to get in but Tippi barricaded the door...."Not the Birds she screamed".

I said get the hell out of the way...It was a movie for god sake...I ran out and dropped to the ground as to not get pecked in the face. There it was a full corned beef on the sidewalk so I grabbed it and chucked it into the street and with it went the birds...

When I got up there was bloody Irish folk all over the place. It was awful.....Irish people can be so sloppy especially on St. Patty's day...

I went back inside and Tippi was singing "It's a great day for the Irish" at the piano. I guess that "Old Fashion" hit her quick...

I joined in and we made like 75 bucks in tips...It was fun....

Well except for the 10 or so maimed people outside waiting to get in...for them it was a St. Patrick's day massacre....

I'll let you know what Nicky Knockers says...

Oh, yeah Tippi is getting me a role on "Fashion House"....very exciting!!!

Kisses, MargOH!